Public Breastfeeding Hard For New Moms
I read this news article and could only sigh and shake my head. Apparently Millions of new mums say breastfeeding in public is still a nightmare. Even in this day and age mothers are still being looked down on for simply feeding their children.
Over at The F-Word there is a great post discussing this issue. The numbers shared are shameful and disturbing to think about. Despite the knowledge that breastfeeding is the best way to nourish children there is still a disaproving glare cast on it from society.
More than one fifth of the women who participated claimed they have left their babies screaming from hunger rather than opting for the alternative of feeding them in a public place. Many women fear that they would be judged for their decision to breast-feed, with 38 per cent of new mums banishing themselves to lavatories as they anticipate a negative reception in a public space. In fact 54 percent of mothers claimed to have received unwanted attention when feeding their babies, with more than 14 per cent confessing to having heated arguments with those who have been so abhorred by their actions. Consequently, more than a third of the women questioned opt to use formula milk in public in order to avoid any unnecessary conflagrations.
Unfortunately it isn’t just confined to the UK. Mothers in the US have seen their fair share of issues over public breastfeeding. And there have also been the online fights such as MySpace removing breastfeeding images as obscene, LiveJournal deleting breastfeeding icons, and FaceBook banning breastfeeding images. It is almost no wonder some moms would rather let their babies cry than try to feed them. The public reactions make it clear which option is more acceptable.
As a two-time mom I’ve done both. When my oldest was little I bought into the fear. I hid in bathrooms, went back to the car, and timed leaving the house to be only exactly between feedings. Which was a daunting task since breastfed babies eat more often and with no real schedule.
Still I worried about other people seeing my breasts and being offended. Never mind that female breasts were already all around us. By the time my second son came along I had a much more “been there, done that” attitude. I carried him in the sling and nursed him in the store, walking down the street, at the thrift shop, at the park, and anywhere else we went. Of all the nursing going on only three times did anyone ever know what I was doing. One when a woman commenting on my sleeping babe and I said he was actually eating, another when a woman got face to face with him trying to get a good look, and lastly when a man at the next table made it his business to stare at my chest as he ate his dinner.
The vast majority of the time people assumed he was sleeping, and I learned not to bother to correct them. He cuddled up close to my chest and drank happily without a fuss. As he got older it became harder to hide what I was doing, but by then I had already gained enough self confidence not to care. Now as a toddler it’s easier to ask him to wait until later, though most of the time he’s too occupied to be bothered with nursing.
breastfeeding, infants, public breastfeeding, mothers, new mothers
October 21st, 2008 at 12:48 am
I think that is so gross to nurse a toddler. When you have to ask your kid to wait until later, time to cut the cord mom. They can eat food at that age.
April 17th, 2009 at 3:26 pm
1. Here is the mom of a nursing 34 month old lively rambunctious boy. Yes, for those of you concerned, he is almost three years old, 37 1/2 inches and 32 lbs. He speaks English and Spanish, counts to 20 in English and to 10 in Spanish, knows all the letters all the colors and all the shapes, says please/por favor and thank you/gracias, spontaneously, (many times before and after nursing) has had only two short tantrums his entire life, and is hardly ever sick. How much do our continued nursing and co-sleeping contribute to his incredible emotional stability? I think a lot.
Only those of us that have known both nursing and non-nursing toddlers know how wonderful the “terrible twos” can be.
I say it is OK to call me selfish for wanting to have the happiest, healthiest, best behaved kid on the block…
Incidentally, my mother in law, who already protested my INITIAL breastfeeding (”my kids grew up fine on cow’s milk, he will get addicted” she used to say when he was born)and who finds our continued nursing relationship “embarrassing” and “exocentric”, commented recently that her youngest son had used a bottle until he was SIX. And that was reasonable….
April 27th, 2009 at 2:10 pm
I do not object to public nursing, what offends me is when moms do not have the decency to cover themsevles up. Breastfeeding is a private moment between mother and child, not for everybody to see! I do not want the 16 year old son to have to see the exposed nipples of nursing moms at restaurants, malls, etc. No one really understands this aspect of public breastfeeding. For me, it is the exposure of mom’s nipple that I can’t take!!