Thoughts On The Cheerleader Attackers
I love checking my email and getting my daily dose of parenting sanity via The Daily Groove. The nuggets of gold that I’m sent every day are stored away, saved for when I might need them the most. Today’s nugget seemed timely for recent news.
Raising a child in harmony with human nature is like driving to a distant city. The road isn’t straight, but it’ll get you there.
For example, the road to independence as an adult is via dependence as a baby. Going straight to independence is a disaster.
You know you’ve veered off course when the ride becomes suddenly rough, so you steer back to the smooth road. Responsive parenting is like that: answering a baby’s cries or a child’s aggression with unconditional love and nurturing.
But when driving, you *rarely* veer off the road. You stay *centered* in your lane for a smooth ride! You stay *attuned* to the road, so you can adjust course BEFORE you veer off.
In other words, you can PREspond!
Today, if you hit a rough spot with your child, be REsponsive, but also consider how you might have PREsponded, and refine your attunement accordingly.
Pleasure-oriented PREsponsiveness can turn your parenting journey into a JOYride!
As I read this I wondered where some parents missed the curve in the road and failed to PREspond to their children, sailing off the road and continuing down the side of the mountain. The parents I mean are the ones of these girls.
If you haven’t heard the story yet, a group of cheerleaders ambushed another girl and beat her. All the while recording the attack, happily, to show off their inhumanity on the internet. Apparently this is something to be proud of. Somewhere along the road these girls got the message that violence is not only OK, but fun. Somewhere along the road to adulthood they were taught that ganging up on another human being was a moment to be proud of.
I wonder whether they were taught empathy, respect, or understanding.
Sadly this kind of thing is not new and not solely a product of the YouTube generation. I clearly recall in high school a young girl who was drug into the street and beaten by a group of 6 girls in front of countless witnesses who did nothing. Her crime? Dating the main girl’s boyfriend months before. No one videotaped the attack, no one was thinking of posting it on the internet, and yet it happened still. Somewhere along the way the parents missed an important sign in the road and failed to preemptively respond.
parenting, attachment parenting, abuse
April 11th, 2008 at 1:24 pm
One of the mothers (of the attackers) was on GMA the other morning. She said that she was upset because the cheerleaders were being “villified”. She also thought that the video was being portrayed “unfairly”.
Which just goes to show you why these girls thought it was just fine to do this.
April 13th, 2008 at 12:12 am
[...] Thoughts On The Cheerleader Attackers - An email I received from The Daily Groove gave me some food for thought on the attack of the violent cheerleaders. [...]
August 26th, 2009 at 4:02 am
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